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Thread: Campfire humour: ALL JOKES IN THIS THREAD PLEASE

  1. #10396
    Member Gibo's Avatar
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    P38, 7mmsaum, veitnamcam and 4 others like this.
    Rule 4. Identify your target beyond all doubt.

  2. #10397
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    puku, veitnamcam, Brian and 3 others like this.

  3. #10398
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    Semper excretia Ryan's Avatar
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    How appropriate.
    P38, gadgetman, Munsey and 3 others like this.

  5. #10400
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    Quote Originally Posted by sako75 View Post
    errr, my wife owns a triton, we went into town to get an suv but they all had gay-o-matic transmissions so bought a ute

  6. #10401
    Member Fawls's Avatar
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    Ralph and Edna


    Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't
    mean they don't love you with all they have.

    Ralph and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while
    they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Ralph suddenly
    jumped into the deep end.

    He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly jumped in
    to save him.
    She swam to the bottom and pulled him out.
    When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Edna's heroic act she
    immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now
    considered her to be mentally stable.

    When she went to tell Edna the news she said, 'Edna, I have good news
    and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged, since you were
    able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of
    the person you love. I have concluded that your act displays sound
    mindedness.

    The bad news is, Ralph hanged himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe
    belt right after you saved him.
    I am so sorry, but he's dead.'

    Edna replied, 'He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry...

    How soon can I go home?'
    puku, P38, 7mmsaum and 10 others like this.

  7. #10402
    Member Gibo's Avatar
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    Rule 4. Identify your target beyond all doubt.

  8. #10403
    Member Ryan_Songhurst's Avatar
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    Congratulations to Whitney Houston, five years drug free today
    P38, 7mmsaum, veitnamcam and 10 others like this.

  9. #10404
    Member Dundee's Avatar
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    Thats good i've stopped drinking on every day of the week except the ones that start with T,so Tuesdays and Thursdays for me and Today
    P38, veitnamcam, gadgetman and 2 others like this.
    "Thats not a knife, this is a knife"
    Rule 2: Always point firearms in a safe direction
    CFD

    http://www.timeanddate.com/countdown...7&font=cursive

  10. #10405
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dundee View Post
    Thats good i've stopped drinking on every day of the week except the ones that start with T,so Tuesdays and Thursdays for me and Today
    Me too, but to make it easier I decided I would only drink on days that end in y.
    P38, Dundee, gadgetman and 1 others like this.

  11. #10406
    P38
    P38 is offline
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    Guys

    Just remember your not an alcoholic until you stop drinking.

    Until then your just a hopeless drunk. .

    Cheers
    Pete
    Arguing with an Engineer is like Wrestling a Pig in Mud.

    After awhile you realise the Pig loves it.

  12. #10407
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dundee View Post
    Thats good i've stopped drinking on every day of the week except the ones that start with T,so Tuesdays and Thursdays for me and Today
    Quote Originally Posted by screamO View Post
    Me too, but to make it easier I decided I would only drink on days that end in y.
    Well I do a mix of both of you. I drink T on every day of the week ending in a Y.
    jakewire and Gibo like this.
    There are only three types of people in this world. Those that can count, and those that can't!

  13. #10408
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    I am sure it has been here before but always motive to laugh!

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    Gibo and nevereadyfreddy like this.

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