Holy F#[&... I saw a buck
That's right folks you heard it right here,
I've been off the hills for half a year.
With knee surgery and rehab done,
Today was the day I went out with my gun.
Leaving the car with a brace on my knee,
I was excited and happy and grinning with glee.
Slowly across and down to the stream,
the sun on my rifle was making it gleam.
Full ninja mode I now had engaged,
Bush lawyer and supplejack trying to get me enraged.
A rabbit is the first animal I see,
I leave it, I want something bigger for me.
Across the flats then heading upstream,
I stop often to ensure nothing goes unseen.
Up ahead I hear noises, what could it be,
I find it's just birds shredding the bark of a tree.
Onwards and upwards I continue to stalk,
This being in the bush sure trumps a dog walk.
Through promising spots I now check the time,
Towards home I now turn, hey this is starting to rhyme.
Now this is where the day turned to shit,
For some dumb reason I dropped my guard a bit.
Over the crest of a small wee spur,
I hear the thunder of hooves and a big creamy blur.
Yes straight away folks I knew my mistake,
I see the biggest set of antlers I've wanted to take.
It doesn't run far but it's hidden behind trees,
I often see deer in positions like these.
With the bolt lowered and rifle held tight,
I wait his movement into my sight.
He grunts and steps forward still nothing I see,
Just a back leg shot available to me.
By this time he's had enough of this shit,
He lurches forward though the scrub before he gets hit.
Now as he moves things change in my view,
Not just one set of antlers but now I see two.
Forward I creep to look over the brow,
Nothing is seen but a very distant cow.
To my left I now glance and what do I see,
A big fat hare, frozen and staring at me.
It thinks I can't see it sitting over there,
Meanwhile I'm thinking I could shoot it right in the ear.
Some meat would be better than nothing at all,
But I'm still imagining those antlers hanging on my wall.
I leave the hare and search for the deer,
Knowing full well they would be nowhere near.
It is now that I make a beeline for home,
I reach the car which is now in the car park alone.
One things for sure I'll be back for a look,
That buck would be nice on my butchers hook.
