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Thread: weaponised farting

  1. #1
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    weaponised farting

    I know the missus gives me the evils if I do one the night after, well most times actually. But this is piss funny


    https://wwos.nine.com.au/news/darts-...3-bafdfacacb58

  2. #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by csmiffy View Post
    I know the missus gives me the evils if I do one the night after, well most times actually. But this is piss funny


    https://wwos.nine.com.au/news/darts-...3-bafdfacacb58
    youre mistaken ya goon -what she said to you was FFS-give it a little more choke and itll burst into life!!
    In my TF days a certain westcoast soldier was renowned for the most horrendous gut churning farts on charter parades-it smelt as though it had been marinating 6months in sewage before it was released to VIPs.many's the time when an inspection party trundling between ranks inspecting troops,suddenly developed huge sniffles and almost burst into a double time.At least they could get to clean air we had to endure the biological warfare wafting about us with nary a sound or movement
    bastard did it one night in an ambush drill-even the DS staff were overcome ,with one enemy loudly bellowing he could smell some bastard 200m upwind.he reckoned he had it bad we were 5-10m away and downwind of the mongrel.!prick swore by baked beans-ate tons of them!
    Maca49 likes this.

  3. #3
    Member Cordite's Avatar
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    I eat raisins and they burn the skin and have a similar effect on the room air.
    Join COLFO - Be a represented firearms owner.

  4. #4
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    cooked cabbage is also nauseatingly effective likewise boiled eggs on some people .mate of my sons says indian samosas will clear a seat in the pub like nothing on earth .hes as ugly as sin so why he needs to fart to create space is beyond me.

  5. #5
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    nope, a mega hot vindaloo will not only give you farts of death but turn your bum into a japanese flag
    Max Headroom likes this.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by gonetropo View Post
    nope, a mega hot vindaloo will not only give you farts of death but turn your bum into a japanese flag
    And incinerate your bed, I would have thought.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Max Headroom View Post
    And incinerate your bed, I would have thought.
    i'm currently growing carolina reaper challis, so hot you have to wear 2 sets of latex gloves to pick them. cant wait !
    a few years back i grew some ghost peppers, i put 1/2 a dozen into a bottle of vodka for a month then removed them. next step was to chill the vodka to sub zero in the freezer and offer a shot to "the tough guy" at work. he skulled it down and a few seconds later it was like a scene from the exorcist. the next day he couldnt be found apart from screams from the portaloo
    mikee, 223nut, Blisters and 1 others like this.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by gonetropo View Post
    he couldnt be found apart from screams from the portaloo
    That's a pretty reliable tracker. Wonder if he knew what was coming and put his toilet paper in the fridge beforehand?

  9. #9
    Member Marty Henry's Avatar
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    Cucumber, gas at both ends for me I try to avoid it at all costs and celery which must be the devils vegetable.
    How here suffers from hangi pants?

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marty Henry View Post
    Cucumber, gas at both ends for me I try to avoid it at all costs and celery which must be the devils vegetable.
    How here suffers from hangi pants?
    i just dont eat fruit and vege!
    Marty Henry likes this.

  11. #11
    Sending it Gibo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gonetropo View Post
    i'm currently growing carolina reaper challis, so hot you have to wear 2 sets of latex gloves to pick them. cant wait !
    a few years back i grew some ghost peppers, i put 1/2 a dozen into a bottle of vodka for a month then removed them. next step was to chill the vodka to sub zero in the freezer and offer a shot to "the tough guy" at work. he skulled it down and a few seconds later it was like a scene from the exorcist. the next day he couldnt be found apart from screams from the portaloo
    They aint that hot mate. VC and I could fix you up
    Beaker likes this.

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gibo View Post
    They aint that hot mate. VC and I could fix you up
    Fix up is about right.... Need fixing after the stuff you guys have got
    Beaker and Gibo like this.

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gibo View Post
    They aint that hot mate. VC and I could fix you up
    What kind of brutality-in-a-bottle have you two been cooking up?

  14. #14
    Sending it Gibo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Max Headroom View Post
    What kind of brutality-in-a-bottle have you two been cooking up?
    Nah its just that Plutonium shit that @Beaker sent us. VC got a couple of the boys at the Toby shoot, was quite a hoot I thought Ryan S was going to blow up
    Beaker and Mathias like this.

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gibo View Post
    Nah its just that Plutonium shit that @Beaker sent us. VC got a couple of the boys at the Toby shoot, was quite a hoot I thought Ryan S was going to blow up
    Which end were the flames coming out of?

 

 

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